It has been awhile since I posted here. There has been a death in my family, a beloved brother-in-law, and a new birth, a great niece. The rain has drenched our little part of the earth, and the sun has broken out over all the land. The lakes are ice free and the fisherman have arrived. My garden awaits. The cycle continues.
For some reason I’m feeling a bit melancholy today. It may be the natural low after the high of yesterday. I did a Life by Design workshop all day. Seven women gathered in my little house to come into closer view of the patterns that take them away from themselves–and the patterns that bring them closer. This interior movement also seems to unfold in spirals and circles.
Being human is not an easy thing. Amidst all of our desire to do good things, to grow and learn, to build communities and create a kinder world, life continues to slam us against the wall once in a while, and we have no choice but to grow through it. There was a tremendous amount of courage is my little living room yesterday. It was especially sweet because most of the women knew one another from their network and had already seen one each other through many hard times. There was a web of support that was especially strong.
The more I teach this workshop the more committed I become to offering it and even expanding it. It feels like the tools I offer help us to grow a strong and sturdy trunk so that when the winds blow we won’t be knocked over. We’re like trees standing in a huge human forest—some huddling under the “Elders” and some standing bravely out in the openness taking our chances.
Wow. People never cease to amaze me. We deal with death, illness, tragedy. We deal with foolishness and pettiness. We stubbornly try to stand strong against the mind-numbing stupidity of the big birds who don’t understand that if you fowl the nest, the babies won’t survive. End of story.
One thing I know for certain—we need each other. When I scan through the hundreds and hundreds of workshops I’ve taught over the years, one single human desire stands out miles above any other. We want to be in relationship—with a partner, with a child, with a parent, with each other, with the earth, with the animals. Relationship is about the only thing that really matters—and it is so easy to muck up our relationships.
I remember being with Bert Hellinger, the grandfather of Family Constellation Work, and he talked about this finely tuned mechanism that exists in all relationships. It is the balancing mechanism of give and take that is always operating either positively or negatively. If you hurt me—then I will hurt you back. Conversely, if you do something nice for me, I must do something nice for you. Sounds so simple! We just need to be conscious of working this natural law in our favor. If you give me a rose—I’ll give you two. If you cook me supper—I’ll pour you a glass of wine and do the dishes. How fun would it be to be in an unspoken competition to do more and more nice things for one another instead of scorekeeping and plotting a way to get back?
My husband made me high protein pancakes and eggs today. I did the dishes.
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